


Melted Fracture

by DeiUta



Series: Opposites and Synonyms Attract [4]
Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Angst, Confessions, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Hurt/Comfort, Love Confessions, M/M, Not a Love Story, One-Sided Attraction
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-01-04
Updated: 2018-01-04
Packaged: 2019-02-28 11:03:54
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 811
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13270104
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/DeiUta/pseuds/DeiUta
Summary: Yamaguchi fractures, and a part of him knows he’ll never, ever find the splinters.He has no one to blame but himself.





	1. Bitter

**Author's Note:**

> A/N: I don’t know how I ended up continuously writing for a fandom I’m not even really a part of, but here we are.

Yamaguchi confesses.

 

Tsukishima rejects.

 

Despite having prepared for this exact outcome, despite having told himself the entire time he’s known Tsukki he wouldn’t like him back. Having the last, growing bit of hope erased into oblivion still hurts. It hurts like a motherfucker, like a fatherfucker, like a—

 

“Can we still be friends, then?” he forces himself to blurt as soon as his friend’s rejection is comprehended.

 

Tsukishima looks withdrawn, and hesitant, but while Yamaguchi was unsure about his friend returning the depth of his feelings, he knows their friendship is the easiest thing in Tsukki’s life. _[And until it becomes otherwise, he’ll remain by Tadashi’s side.]_

 


	2. Truths

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Later, At Volleyball Practice

 

-

Later, at Volleyball Practice

-

 

 

 

“Tsukki—”

 

“ _Only Yamaguchi is allowed to_ —”

 

He doesn’t have to turn around to know he’s hurt him. But he does, anyways.

 

And oh, how broken he looks. If he were a different person, Yachi, maybe, he might find it sad how much _broken_ suited Yamaguchi, how it fit him better than knee pads and a sheepish grin.

 

But he’s not, so he doesn’t.

 

Yamaguchi’s voice comes back to him, strangled and so embroiled with emotion Tsukki vaguely wonders how they ever managed to be friends. “Y-you don’t even…?" _Remember my voice?_ "I’m not—”  _Yamaguchi anymore?_  But words are beyond his childhood friend.

 

As he realizes Tsukishima has no intention of taking it _back_ , of lying to them any longer, he folds like the first origami ball Akiteru gave Kei, who wouldn’t rest until he could replicate the small item with his eyes closed.

 

He folds, and surprisingly, there are no tears. Only a final “Sorry, Tsukki— _shima_.” His tongue curls foreignly around the last two syllables, and they curl foreignly within Kei’s eardrum. But then again: it’s not as though he’d ever bothered memorizing voices.

 

\--

 

Yamaguchi fractures, and a part of him knows he’ll never, ever find the splinters.

 

Yamaguchi fractures, and knows, even through the unimaginable pain, irrevocably, that even the _mold_ of Yamaguchi Tadashi he occasionally allowed himself to withdraw into was ruined.

 


	3. Vivid Orange

Honestly? Hinata is there. Like how the air will inevitably change, gain a new scent, as the seasons pass a baton.

 

 

Hinata is there like the stars—ever moving, yet somehow constant.

 

Yamaguchi bitterly and wetly chuckles at the thought that all he might remember of this time, visually, is the vivid orange hair of his teammate. But he can’t find it in himself to resent a millimeter of the image.

 

Hinata finds him, might be the only one who _looks_ for him, after that practice. Because while Yamaguchi is willing to bare his entire self before Kei, he never makes his friend, and therefore anyone, see more than he has to. Which is why Hinata even _knowing_ that Yamaguchi was far from okay was both miraculous and terrifying. Had he slipped? Had his carefully constructed image of fragile but always o-k finally collapsed in on itself? Unlikely, given how only Shouyou’s arms were protecting him from the cruelty of the world. Which only meant Hinata was far more perceptive than anyone except maybe Kageyama gave him credit for, and Yamaguchi really wished he’d properly appreciated Hinata before it came to this. Well, no time like the present.

 

“… _thank you_ ,” he croaks through the tears.

 

 

Later, they would have many conversations about love, friendship, how they related to themselves and the rest of the world. For now, Hinata simply nods before continuing to rub calming targets down Yamaguchi’s arms and back, which, funnily enough, is all he’d ever been to Kei. He could only hope he was still visible to him after all this.

 

\--

 

 

They call it ‘one-sided love’, but all he wants to respond to that with is a scream: _then how did I believe otherwise, all these years?!_


	4. Yet

He had no one to blame but himself. He knew. _He knew what Kei was_ —an apathetic untrusting fuck who only did what was convenient—and yet.

 

And yet that didn’t stop Kei from giving Tadashi the softer blanket when memories of his father made his world **vibrate**. From gracefully sliding Kei’s expensive headphones over Tadashi’s ears after a particularly scathing reprimand from a teacher for shaking instead of speaking. From taking him to McDonalds and using those pretty, slender fingers of his to pick out the softest, floppiest French fries from both of their trays and delicately piling them all on Tadashi’s plate on his birthday, despite how much he hates the feel of grease on his skin. From the following sleepover in which the cold November air is nullified by the heat of Kei’s body against Tadashi’s, further amplified by Kei’s dinosaur comforter—a gift from Tadashi 3 years ago he could never quite get rid of.

 

He was an idiot, a fool.

 

Tadashi huffed an exhausted laugh. _You were right, Tsukki. From the instant you saw me, you knew: I’m awfully pathetic._

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This was one of the fastest things I've churned out, but also probably the most...emotional?


End file.
